I dont know what to do!!!!

11 years ago

I was earlier in a relationship for 3 years, but it was an abusive 1, so after long struggle i came out of it, thanx to a best friend of mine.soon i fell in love with this person, and finally he also turned out to be rude and unexpectedly cruel.now we are in separate ways working in different places, but i found out that he was cheatn on me wid a gal working wid him, and i broke up wid him.But i cant get him off my head...i kip calln him begging him to take me back..but my real problem is there is this guy in my office hu loves me a lot, told him about my past relationships and wat has happened, but still he wants to be wid me...i dnt know wat to do, i was hurt twice...m rele afraid now!!!

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  • Pav
    11 years ago

    I empathize for your past relationships Sanjana.

    Seriously, my advice is , if you are working, then i gather you must be mature enough to decide whom to be with; Easy way is get married to person of your parents choice. but, it you want to find one for yourself, this time stop looking for love and start looking for commitment.
    You feel like bouncing back to ur cruel boyfriend? hmm r u out of your mind? (sorry). Sanjana you dont have to be so obsessive abt him, he is never gonna respect you or your feelings.
    Try to be with one who loves you more, then the one whom u love. its always happier like that.
    By the way, this new guy in ur office, does he truly Love you or does he think you are easy to love and ditch! like other bf of urs did??? be sure of him before u get into a relationship again. Basing on ur past hurt you must be clever enough to find a guy if he is loving u or if he is just another cruel idiot! Takecare Sanjana :)

    **"BELIEVE ME, GUYS WHO DON'T

  • Pav
    11 years ago

    Cont.....

    "BELIEVE ME, GUYS WHO DON'T RESPECT WOMEN, CANT NEVER BE SUCCESSFUL IN ANYTHING"

    That actually means, you want to go back to a looser? do u?

    (Sorry for repetitive Replies it was my mistake)

  • 11 years ago

    Hi Pav,
    thanx for the comment(yeah i did laugh for a while when i saw your repeated replies :D ). i kinda sure this guy at office is true, cos i have hurt him very bad and deep wid my words(keeping the anger towards my ex in mind, i mean my past relationships), but he neva complained to me about it, so i feel all the more horrible, and when i told him about my past he neva said a word back.i think he loves me for real, but still...my heart doesnt wana believe it... i dnt wana cry again...but wen i c some1 being honest wid me for the first time...i feel so odd...am rele going crazy...

  • 11 years ago

    Hey Sanjana...
    I am rele sorry about ur past relationships, cos i think they dont deserve a person like u, its ok to feel bad abt the guy hu is working and in love wid u. but the point is u must be rele slow in analysing this guy.take ur own time, talk to each other, open up and tell him why u have been rude with him all this time (please do not hurt any1 again like that, kipn ur past in mind, wat if maybe,he's the ryt guy).
    Just take a deep breath now,call him now and talk about evrything u wana say... wishing u all the best :)

  • Pav
    11 years ago

    Hey Sanjana

    I completely agree with Angle :)

    This time around get involved in a relationship only when you u can be committed, otherwise another breaking up because of family or some other problems..........will hurt u again,and i guess u don't deserve it.

    Breaking up with a honest person is more worse then breaking up with an idiot.

    single reply! :)

  • 11 years ago

    @Pav: its nice to meet u like this in this forum...but its ANGEL and not ANGLE!!! there's a lot of difference u c...
    angles are in maths, but angels are in heaven!!!
    :D

  • 11 years ago

    Sorry Angel..... :) Nice to meet u too...

  • 11 years ago

    Hi Sanjana,Pav

    thanx for ur comment.i can understand what u r trying to tell me, but now,i have made up my mind...u can call me coward if u want, but m not tryn to hurt myself again, i have told a straight NO to the guy in my office, i dont wana experiment wid my life again,
    Pav: u r ryt ..its worse breaking up wid an honest person...
    Angel: i did call him up sterday, but he neva came to office..m worried abt that too, and yea i know wat i did to him by huirting him was way out of the world..
    its like i cant stand any1 loving me...i just go crazy...
    So i have decided to walk away from this...i dont think i can love any1 again...
    but then y am i feeling bad cos he dint turn up to the office today???
    am i in love again???

  • 11 years ago

    oops...angel....i misspelt ur name wid mine...m rele out of the world!!! :P
    hope u can understand :D

  • vin
    11 years ago

    hey sanjana!!!
    why u r in a dilema?????
    jus be cool........dont worry cal u office mate and explain ur situation so that he can give u a better option!!!!!!!!
    he'll understand ur problem and try to help!!!!

  • Pav
    11 years ago

    Sanjana....
    Firstly,You are not coward. Nope not at all.Secondly, You are absolutely wrong when u say " you cant love again" .Thirdly, could you please stop worrying abt him, if he did not come to office their might be some personal reason, why do you blame yourself? Plz dont stress, and plz dont blame urself for everything good/bad gonna happen in his life.
    Its simple, you sympathize for his problems and start showing empathy on him. Bang! you are back to square one!!!!
    Sanjana....spend time to urself, take a break ....make new hobbies or new interests which keeps you busy.
    Love, abuse, cheating, honesty,dishonesty...... really do u wanna get fixed in this web..?i dont think so!! U can do better then this sanjana...

    Your heart needs to be free for some time, you need to be single again for some time ,it helps you to gather confidence in Love.

    "By running and changing buses all the time, one can never know how beautiful a walk can be" i hop

  • pav
    11 years ago

    conti.....

    "By running and changing buses all the time, one can never know how beautiful a walk can be" i hope u understand,wt i meant.

    I guess u care for your colleague no doubt in that....but i don't recon u r in love with him...

  • 11 years ago

    Hey Sanjana...
    just stop blaming urself gal...its not ur fault that things dint work out well in the past, and its totaly not ur fault for things happening now...
    like Pav said, u r not a coward, and u r definitely not in love wid him...u just need a break from all this drama, i suggest u call him up and speak to him. tell him u need a break now from all this, so that u can think about havn a relationship wid him wid free mind. Right now u have lots of thots in ur mind,( about ur ex) u cant love any1 like that, or even work properly.
    So just talk to him about having a break, hope he is not forcing u into this relationship...tc

  • 11 years ago

    vin,pav and sanjana...
    thank u so much for all those advices, esp pav and angel...
    i did run away for a while cos i was scared to face reality, but as u guys said i have called my friend from office, explained to him my situation in detail..and guys things have changed a lot, he is my best frend now. I made myself clear that i dint want any relationship now, he said he was fine wid it and that he wud wait until i had some feelings for him. Now he's my best friend evvver... and perhaps the best thing that has happened to me... am rele happy now, and work place is the best place after home, everythings back to normal.
    And o yea my ex called me up saying sorry....and i was so bold enuf to tell him "BUZZ OFF!!!", it rele feels good now...
    thanks guys...thanks a lot!!!!

  • Pav
    11 years ago

    Hi Sanjana,

    Good to know everything turned out well , Happy for you. just be care ful with your best friend work mate, though you are very clear, his dreams n intentions might be the same, ot may be even growing more day by day.

    The point is do you see the future with him? irrespective of ur parents /family involvement in future? Otherwise u might end up hurting him badly.
    have courage to change his love towards you into friendship or be careful :)

    Good u slam the door on ur ex!

    Tc
    pav

  • 11 years ago

    all the best gal...kip rocking! Like pav said be careful so that u dnt giv him false hopes, if u want this to happen then its fine, else...its gona hurt the both of u..be careful...All the best :)

" Lovers, like bees, lead a honey-sweet life. "

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